His most recent books include performance management a briefcase book, and the complete idiots guide to dealing with difficult employees. Jul 08, 2018 most people become challenged and confronted on occasion by others who differ in their opinions and who desire and are determined to argue. I read a few of the phrases before attending most of my meetings. In defusing angry people, kevin fauteux utilizes his experience treating patients anger issues, gives important steps to understanding rage, and then shows how to employ specific deescalation assessment techniques to effectively defuse volatile situations. Heres a rundown, from the psychological point of view, of what it takes to get angry customers to take their emotional levels down a notch. Defusing hostile customers workbook for the public sector unique, powerful, specifically written for government. Apr 04, 2014 defusing hostile customers workbook a selfinstructional book for government contains dozens of exercises you can do to improve your skills. Practical tools for handling bullying, threats, and. This could be about almost anything and with almost. Uncontrolled anger is the devils tool to keep that person upset and outofcontrol. You can start by asking angry people what their names are.
Those friends and family members can tell dozens of other people. A site dedicated to those in the public sector who deal with difficult, angry, frustrated taxpayers. Its only natural to respond in an angry way excuse myth. Getting angry is the only way to get things done manipulative myth. Defusing hostile customers workbook answering angry. Verbal of physical venting will have lasting, calming effects. The promise bacal makes for the defusing hostile customers workbook is that. When you feel disconnected from people, its far easier to feel angry with them. Defusing angry people teaches readers the ways to manage combustible situations such as calming a verbally abusive person, not being intimidated by a bully, handling a serious threat and protecting ones self from volatile encounters.
Besides my own experiences, defusing the angry patronreflects the comments and experiences of 10,000 public and college librarians and paraprofessionals who have attended my workshops on the topic, as well as dozens of reference librarians, circulation staff, and other public and academic library workers in ten states who responded to a short. Tips for defusing angry customers map communications. Read defusing angry people practical tools for handling bullying, threats, and violence by kevin fauteux available from rakuten kobo. Here are ten powerful steps to defuse angry customers, address the issues and sustain customer loyalty. While some of the above tips have encouraged listening and. A decade ago, bad word of mouth could only go so far. Books for people dealing with difficult, angry and frustrated. Defusing angry people is a well written overview of anger from many angles. Finally, something so simple that even angry people can learn to remember it under pressure. Schafer received permission to make his training available to the public. Maintain neutral eye contact with the aggressive person, but dont make it seem as if you are staring. So that we are all on the same wavelength here, it would be a good idea to clarify the terms we are going to use. Apr 06, 2010 a critical step is learning how to defuse angry people so that the agency and the customer work together.
Anyone in fact who comes in contact with angry people in any part. We also discuss the needs of angry people, and the rules of the abuse game. Before you know it, one single interaction can have profound consequences. Strongly confronting an angry person will get them to back down. All of that is practice for bigger blowups when bigger challenges arise. The index is thorough and the bibliography comprehensive. One employee strikes another and then pulls out a weapon and starts to go on a shooting spree. Download it once and read it on your kindle device, pc, phones or tablets. Angry customers tell friends and family members about their dissatisfaction.
The rise of social media has made positive customer relations even more vital. In this video, robbie demonstrates a technique from nlp called pacing and leading to successfully deal with these situations. It presents a basic framework for understanding manipulative and angry people. Also reminds me of hakomi and riding the rapids, in which a part is passionately enraged and railing on for usually not more than 510 minutes. While written for the public sector, the skills and. In this chapter, fromdefusing hostile customers workbook, we explain the key to defusing angry customers understanding what they want and need in order to calm down. Defusing hostile customer workbook for the public sector and.
Practical tools for handling bullying, threats, and violence kindle edition by fauteux, kevin. Defusing the angry patron american library association. If appropriate apologize on behalf of the organization without blaming anyone. Jul 09, 2015 people get angry at their computers and traffic lights, other drivers and checkout lines. Defusing the angry patron is highly recommended for all libraries, but especially public and academic the concepts and strategies in the book are pure gold. An impoverished city junior high school j ohn cooke is the veteran junior high school vice principal of discipline for 900 adolescents. Learn to defuse angry customers, reduce stress from them, and be better at your customer. To browse his books on management, difficult people and how to deal with angry people drop by his amazon author page. Defusing hostile customers workbook a selfinstructional book for government contains dozens of exercises you can do to improve your. Defusing hostile customers a selfinstructional workbook for public sector employees is a seminar in a book and contains an amazing collection of specific phrases and actions that can be learned by any public sector employee, drawn.
Robert bacal is a noted author, keynote speaker, and management consultant. How to defuse even the most hostile government customers. The work911 supersite contains many more free articles and tips on a number of workplace topics. Dealing with someone who is very angry can be intimidating or worse. Its unpleasant, unfulfilling, and sometimes unmanageable. These alarming statistics show unchecked anger is all around us, whether it be hostile individuals, backstabbing family members, bullies, or normally. Use these anger management books to take back control. But today, anger seems to have become a more pervasive and sometimes violent presence in our lives. Defusing angry people using pacing and leading youtube. One of the reasons working with selection from be your customers hero book. Chapter 8, help is at hand, offers practical tools for you to use when coping with angry patrons. The conflict resolution phrase book by barbara mitchell and cornelia gamlem is for you. Keep this miniguide of techniques you can use to defuse even the toughest and aggressive customers.
In this chapter, from defusing hostile customers workbook, we introduce some important definitions, and explain when and how people learn to be verbally aggressive. The defusing hostile customers workbook is a workbook, a manual, and a practice guide all in one. According to this author, that is a form, rather mangled, but a form of anger. How you respond will determine whether the customer goes on to tell all his friends and family how terrible your business is or instead rave about your unmatched customer.
These alarming statistics show unchecked anger is all around us, whether it be hostile. One way to defuse a persons anger is to focus his attention on something else. Defusing the angry patron is her most popular workshop topic and is the title of her forthcoming book. John has had plenty of practice calming down young people. Schafer teaches them how to defuse angry people without blowing their cover. Defusing angry people ebook by kevin fauteux rakuten kobo. Like cpr for interacting with the world, this book is valuable for clinicians or lay people alike. Effective strategies for defusing aggressive behavior. Jun 04, 2019 here are ten powerful steps to defuse angry customers, address the issues and sustain customer loyalty. Practical tools for handling bullying, threats, and violence fauteux, kevin on.
Each chapter contains examples, is clearly written and has a summary at the end. One way to address or preempt the attack is to begin the defusing process before the other person gets on an abusive rant. Hanh advocates using meditation and empathy techniques to defuse anger and turn it into. Practical tools for handling bullying, threats and violence. Saying, im sorry, or, im going to try to fix this, can go a long way toward defusing many situations. Due to recent nationally published events where angry people have resorted to violence, dr.
After reading it, i decided to put it to use immediately. People can learn to act in ways that reduce this kind of behavior, and ensure that they do not do anything that will result in. Apr 11, 2017 dealing with someone who is very angry can be intimidating or worse. Defusing hostile customers workbook third edition2010. Our seminar in a book written specifically for people who interact with customers within the government public sector context, is the only book of its kind in existence. Bacals content is enriched from the experience of several thousand public sector employees who have participated in bacals seminar called defusing hostile customers. Book excerpt what angry people want and need by robert bacal. Defusing angry people goodreads meet your next favorite book. Now based in california, rubin originally learned how to cope with confrontational people while setting up library service in the cook county jails chicago in the 1970s. Then use the names a number of times during your encounters. Kevin fauteux we have all encountered angry people and each of us has, at times, felt angry.
When you can defuse someones anger, it can enhance your professional reputation, and it can help you deal with people who struggle to manage their emotions. Dealing with angry people communication skills from. Nov 08, 2017 the conflict resolution phrase book by barbara mitchell and cornelia gamlem is for you. One in five adults has and anger management problem, and 45 pe. Defusing angry people by kevin fauteux overdrive rakuten. Practical tools for handling bullying, threats, and violenceone in five adults has and anger management problem, and 45 percent are losing their tempers on a regular basis. Body language can help to defuse aggressive behavior, says the national association of social workers.
One in five adults has and anger management problem, and 45 percent are losing their tempers on a regular basis. People get angry at their computers and traffic lights, other drivers and checkout lines. Overview and benefits of the defusing hostile customers. Angry customer guides and defusing techniques hundreds of tips and techniques for dealing with nasty people. Jan 05, 2020 in this chapter, from defusing hostile customers workbook, we introduce some important definitions, and explain when and how people learn to be verbally aggressive. How do libraries deal with angry comments on their websit. Chapter 72 goto tactics for defusing angry customers few people enjoy working with angry or irate customers. It was a hostile work environment, says connie schmoll, executive director of shelter house inc. Its a handbook of sorts, a reference book, filled with clever phrases and questions all designed to help you in conflict situations. These agents encounter volatile angry people on an almost daily basis. From defusing hostile customers workbook public sector. I even found a description of myself that was very enlightening.
Employees can do things to defuse anger and reduce abusive behavior. Mar 17, 2015 angry customers tell friends and family members about their dissatisfaction. Practical tools for handling bullying, threats, and violence kevin fauteux one in five adults has and anger management problem, and 45 percent are losing their tempers on a regular basis. Book excerpt what angry people want and need by robert bacal you might think you understand what angry customers need in order to calm down and work with you, but you might be wrong. Also reminds me of hakomi and riding the rapids, in which a part is passionately enraged and railing. Angry and frustrated people usually indicate their mood prior to opening their mouths and beginning a hostile attack. Practical tools for handling bullying, threats, and violence.
One 1998 study found that rumination increased feelings of anger, while distraction can decrease them. Dissatisfied customers are, unfortunately, a fact of business life. You can do this with laughter, if its appropriate its impossible to laugh and be angry at the same time. Defusing hostile customers workbook for the public sector is chock full of specific techniques that can be used on the job immediately to shorten abusive interactions and reduce complaints up the line. Defusing hostile customer workbook for the public sector.
What angry people need and want when you have dealt with an angry customer, you may have asked yourself what does this person want from me. Defusing hostile customers workbook 3rd edition ebook. A critical step is learning how to defuse angry people so that the agency and the customer work together. On the other hand, even a small bit of connection can dampen hostile feelings. Use the strategies below to deal with angry people. Dealing with angry people communication skills from mindtools.
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